Dear Michelle,
I want to write you a poem. I want to write you a clever story. I want to pen words that capture the many beautiful memories we shared. I will in time. Right now, all I can put together is this letter to you, this letter to tell you I love you, and I will never stop missing you.
You would be happy to know that I am sitting here eating caviar sipping a glass of bubbles. You would not be happy to know that I am also sitting here crying. I am trying not to cry, not to be sad, but my heart is broken. I know that you left this world today for a better place, but the selfishness of love makes me want you to be here with me. I do find comfort in knowing you are with your father. I know you never stopped missing him. Yet, I am not ready to face the world without you. Who will pick me up and dust me off as you always did the next time that I fall flat on my face?
Those that know you speak first of your brilliant mind, generosity, and conversationalist skills. For me, above all you have always been the person that I could take a problem to, confide in, cry with, admit my failures to, and you never judged. Never an echo chamber or one to patronize, you gave real advice, often hard advice, and you guided me, encouraged me, kept me grounded, and protected me. I have lost track of the number of times things went horribly wrong in my life, and I showed up on your doorstep. I do not know what I will do without you.
For as long as I can remember, you have been the biggest champion of my writing and creative pursuits. At my lowest point of my writing pursuits, it was you that I went to, and as always, you had the words of encouragement I needed. I am now so close to something big, and to think at that low point I almost gave up. I wish that you were going to be with me at my first book signing.
You were always there for me, and you will always be with me in my heart. I miss your hugs already. You are the best hugger in all my world. I will miss your brilliant words. Even those last days, you were clever and could make me laugh. I will keep my promises that I made in our last days together. I will get my books written, and I will travel and see the world. And I will also cherish my friendships just as you did.
I take comfort in knowing you are in a better place, and some day we will all be together again in God’s Heavenly Kingdom. I smile at the thought of you telling my mom and dad all about their grandchildren. Still, it is going to take a great deal of time to accept that you are gone.
I love you so very much.
Love,
Me